Last Season, New Season

Looking back over the last year - photo by Chris Bolin

As I sit here on the train back to my hometown of London, after visiting my brother in Kingston, I find myself watching the countryside drift by, and it got me thinking about these past twelve months, and all that has happened throughout them.

Truthfully, I’ve been reflecting on the past season since the day after it ended, March 15^th. But now that my new training season is underway, and my first training camp is quickly approaching, I’ve been looking at setting my goals for the upcoming year.  Setting new goals is a very personal experience for me. It always starts with reflecting on my past season; where I started, the struggles and obstacles I encountered, how I responded to those struggles and obstacles, and then evaluating how successful I was.

Now, I have to say the last season was really difficult for me. I experienced challenges I had never encountered, and a few that I had. Given all that I went through, I am amazed how I was able to achieve many of the results I have in the past twelve months.

I started the season reluctantly, with a severe lack of motivation, and that was something I had never experienced. You see, motivation is not usually a problem for me. I love to challenge myself, and I truly believe in ‘mind over matter’.  I’m someone who enjoys the process, and takes joy and inspiration from it. So to lack that motivation — it was completely foreign.  Of course I knew I had just experienced an emotional and stressful Olympics in my own country, but I did not understand how, and why this was affecting me.

My lack of desire was strengthened by a long transition period in our sporting federation after the Olympics; my coach (Marcel Lacroix) had retired, and I was not sure which direction my skating was going to take me. I then followed that up with getting t-boned by an SUV, and fracturing my right arm, thus furthering my lack of motivation. Although, this allowed me to secretly enjoy chilling out for a couple more weeks, I also lost the little fitness I had started to regain…

The fall rolled around, and I still struggled with motivation and my arm, although I now had direction in my skating, thanks to my new coaches (Xiuli Wang and Mark Wild). But you know the saying bad things come in threes? Well, I learned first hand, that’s completely not true. I wish they only came in threes! I soon felt my initial post-Olympic struggles trivial to the realities ahead of me.  The loss of very treasured people to both me, and my family, as well as the loss of our 17-year-old puppy, Howi, (who was everyone’s favorite family member) were hard to deal with. I found my only escape and release from my emotional state was training, and in a strange way, that eventually led me back to my motivation (or at least my stubborn determination!).

Fortunately, there were no more big obstacles that I encountered throughout the season, but much of the time, one or many of these obstacles shadowed me, and I must admit I was not always in the best of moods. I had a lot of patient and understanding people around me.

When I reflect on what was a difficult year for me, I can see that I have been successful, in many ways, even beyond my skating, strengthening friendships and family, as well as broadening my perspectives. I find new strength in myself, and after an emotionally and mentally tough year, I’ve realized I have the right people around me to continue moving forward. I feel inspiration in so many more places than I had before, and that inspiration can be hidden in the most unlikely of places.

I’m looking forward to the coming season, and all the challenges ahead. My goals might not be written on paper yet, fully discussed with my coaches, or even fully formed in my head, but the three of us know where we’re going; building toward new heights, ultimately in February of 2014.  But the small goals need to be set and achieved along the way. Most important are my friends, family and teammates that have always been there to help, and to offer a good laugh too!  I know I’m lucky to have the support, and I could not have attained much without them the past year(s!). Motivation isn’t a problem this year, and I’m ready to challenge myself, and bring it when the time comes for the gun to go off.

Now, back to the pretty Ontario countryside, and Otis Redding soulfully serenading me over the rhythm of the train. Good times!